Entering fatherhood is a lot like learning to swim: You breathe and kick, hoping to make it to the other side of the pool without gulping too much water. Cradling a fragile infant in your arms, struggling to place her flailing limbs in her shirtsleeves, or calming a sobbing newborn in the middle of the night can seem daunting, if not impossible, for a new dad. But there’s definitely a light at the end of the tunnel. Here’s what I wish I had known back then:

Thanks to my wife, my girls had all kinds of coordinated outfits with matching knit caps. But, every ensemble I came up with was just a bit, well, off. My tip to all new dads: Don’t worry about it! Ignore the stares from strangers as you push your kid through the supermarket in her Halloween costume. Turns out, new babies don’t know red from blue, or flowers from paisley, so as long as your little one is dressed warmly and comfortably, she’ll be fine.

Newborn crying can be hard to take, and not only because the screeches can bring on a headache; they can also make you doubt your fatherhood skills. But keep in mind that crying is how new babies communicate -- and it’s not necessarily a reflection of how good a new dad you are -- so try to take it in stride. I practiced different calming techniques, like swinging my daughters gently from side to side or using a pacifier. Believe me: You’ll eventually find one that works.

Napping is not only allowed when you have a new baby; it’s strongly encouraged! Late-night feedings, endless diaper changes, and hours of patting your baby to bring up a burp can be exhausting. Lie down -- it’s okay! I aimed to sneak in some sleep when I put my daughters down for a nap. We all woke up in a better mood.

When your new baby is wailing beyond belief, don’t hesitate to make a call to the pediatrician, especially when nothing seems to soothe her or you notice a rash that you swear wasn’t there an hour ago. Your doctor expects to hear from new dads and moms, and talking to an expert will put your mind at ease.

Sure, life is forever altered once your new baby arrives, but not everything has to be tossed out the window. Tiny babies are a pretty adaptable bunch and tend to enjoy being held as you watch hockey, go out for brunch, or just lounge around and read the Sunday papers. So enjoy your time as a new dad!

Photo by Mikael Stenberg on Unsplash

Being a new dad to twin girls, I have been fortunate enough to receive some great gifts.  I celebrated my first Father’s Day in June, as well as taking part in four baby showers before and after the girls were born. 

The following are the best gifts I have received in my time as a new dad:

A Diaper Bag Backpack
Wearing a backpack takes me back to my school days.  It’s fun, and it’s much easier to carry my twin daughters when I have a backpack that doubles as a diaper bag.  The backpack also has multiple compartments to store all the items that any new dad would need while away from home.  You can also get one in a solid color, like black, which is a little more “manly” than some of the other diaper bag designs out there.

A Stroller Cooler
From time to time, it’s nice to enjoy a cold beverage while I’m out walking with the girls. There are some coolers that strap onto the stroller and can hold up to six cans or four bottles. The lining in the cooler prevents the need for ice, and the beverages stay cold for well over an hour. This is definitely a must-have new dad gift.

Sports Team Onesies
As a new dad, there is nothing better than watching my favorite college and professional sports teams play, while my daughters are dressed in outfits ready to support my favorite teams.  One quick suggestion: When registering for gifts, take into account what size clothing your baby should be in during the different sports seasons.

Baby Life Jackets
If your family enjoys spending time out on the water in the summer, as mine does, lifejackets for the kids make a great new dad gift. After we had them, whenever we went boating for the day or the weekend, we didn’t have to worry about renting them -- which can be expensive -- and we always knew the girls were safe.

Burp Cloths
You’ll need plenty of burp cloths, and you can improvise using any cloth at home.  They are much more cost effective, absorbent, and more practical than the frilly designer (and sometimes expensive) burp cloths.  Any new dad could use these -- in bulk!

Photo by David Straight on Unsplash

Learning how to change a diaper isn't rocket science, but there are a few tricks to making the process a bit easier. Believe it or not, if all the stars align, a diaper change can even be a sweet bonding moment. Until, of course, you realize you've got a smear of poo on your forehead. Here are some tricks I’ve picked up as a new mom:

Tip #1: Gather everything you need, such as a clean diaper, plenty of wipes, and a towel or changing pad to keep the floor from getting dirty. And yes, I said "the floor!" I find it's easier to sit on the floor and change my son. This way, I don't have to worry about him rolling off a changing table.

Tip #2: Tell your baby what you're going to do. Even a newborn can start to learn cues. Say, "I'm going to change your diaper now. Please hold still." Show your baby the clean Pampers diaper. My son responds better to diaper changes when I approach it this way,as opposed to suddenly removing him from fun time and stripping him naked without a word -- how jarring!

Tip #3: Check down the back for poop. The worst thing is being 'surprised' by a really dirty diaper.

Tip #4: Although you're concentrating on the task at hand, it really helps if you can simultaneously distract your baby with a toy, a song, or (as they get older) a request, such as, "Can you sing me the ABCs?"

Tip #5: If it's a poopy diaper, use the front inside to do the initial wipe instead of a disposable wipe. This technique cleans up most the mess in one swoop. Put the dirty diaper out of your baby's reach. As you use disposable wipes to clean up any remaining poop, put the wipes in the center of the dirty diaper. When you're all done with the change, roll up the dirty diaper and wipes, and then affix the tabs across the front to make a ball. This traps all the waste inside and will keep your diaper pail smelling decent for longer.

Tip #6: When boys are little, they may pee as a reflex when their penis is exposed to the air. Prevent this -- or at least, prevent a huge mess -- by putting a washcloth over the penis after you prepare the clean Pampers diaper. Girls should be wiped from front to back to prevent the transfer of fecal matter into their vaginas.

Learning how to change a diaper can be a challenge. To become a diaper-changing pro, just remember: Practice makes perfect!

Photo by Marcin Jozwiak on Unsplash

At baby superstores, you can always spot a new dad who’s there for the first time. He’s got this deer-in-the-headlights look. I know, because a little over two years ago, I was that guy!

My vision was swimming with cribs, pack, plays, and strollers when my wife gave me a simple task: Register for a daddy diaper bag. “A bag?” I thought. “I can handle picking out a bag!”

There are so many diaper bags for dads on the market -- purse-style, messenger bag, backpacks, bags with a million pockets, simple totes. I felt a bit intimidated, but after browsing the entire rack, I settled on a gray and black messenger bag. I liked its appearance and figured -- hey, a bag’s a bag.

Now that my son is fifteen months old, I realize that a diaper bag is not just a regular bag. Your very sanity depends on a well-designed diaper bag! I loved many aspects of my daddy diaper bag, but I can compare it to my wife’s tote diaper bag. Both bags had pluses and minuses.

If I could construct the perfect diaper bag for dads, it would feature:

The Right Color and Fabric: Dark colors, like gray, black, and navy, are not only manly, but they’re functional, too. Darker colors hide stains from dirt and food easily. A tough, utilitarian fabric also helps keep the bag looking brand new even though you’ve hauled it to and from a dozen playdates. My bag was so tough that I could toss it in the washing machine, which really helped when Henry squeezed a food pouch all over it!

The Right Shape: I appreciated my messenger-style diaper bag for dads, as it went well with my entire wardrobe, but a backpack-style bag would be even easier to carry.

Compartments: Lots of compartments help keep everything -- diapers, wipes, keys, and phone -- organized. Digging through a big bag with a single pocket is a nightmare, especially when the baby is trying to wiggle out of a new dad’s arms! Look for a bag with side pockets for bottles or sippy cups.

The Extras: My bag came with clips, so I could easily attach it to the stroller. It also came with a changing pad, so I could change Henry in places without changing tables. Mine was very wide and had a plastic backing, so messes were easy to clean up.

It’s the little things that can really help new dads get into the swing of things -- a well-equipped diaper bag just being one of them!

Photo by Kelli McClintock on Unsplash

When I became a father for the second time, I was more confident, less anxious -- but definitely not any less excited. I love having two boys to play with and think they’re the best buds ever. Having two kids has changed my life, and not only my day-to-day duties, but also my overall wants and needs.

While it would be nice to have two me’s to get twice as much done, here are a few realistic gifts for a dads with two kids or more:

Photos: The first baby tends to be the parental-paparazzi magnet. With two kids, I find myself changing diapers more often than reaching for a camera. And now I’m missing twice the firsts, funny faces, and smiles while away at work. Pictures and videos keep me connected to my boys, and are also something I can hold onto for when the boys grow up -- a gift that keeps giving.

Babysitting time: One of the best gifts I ever received was a weekend from my mother-in-law. She took the boys, and I took my wife camping. With two young boys, life has become all about routine. Breaking that routine and spending quality time with my wife is one of the best gifts a dad can ask for.

If your children are anything like my boys, watching the kids for a weekend is a large commitment. But even just a night or a few hours of babysitting is great. Finding a sitter can be tough. And last minute dinner plans don’t tend to work out for second-time dads. Offering to babysit not only saves us the hassle of finding a sitter, it also reminds us to take some time for ourselves.  

Toys and games for all: It’s always amazing watching the boys play, but even more so with others. Toys and games that we can all play together would be a great gift. With my boys, playing tends to be less about the rules and more about what can you throw, imagine, and build. Soft toys we can throw around the yard, big floor puzzles, and other all-inclusive toys and games would make great gifts for dads who now have two buddies to play with.

Video streaming subscription: Getting two boys to sit still isn’t the easiest task in the world -- especially when there are toy cars to be driven! My wife and I always have a movie or TV show at the ready when we need the boys to be in a calmer state, like when we need to get the laundry done. A little video distraction (and a variety a subscription offers) can help a second-time parent get small tasks done. And it’s nice to watch the shows with our kids sometimes, too!

Any father would be lucky to be gifted with one of these dad-approved ideas, that being said, the best gift of all has been being able to be a dad to my boys!