Baby by Surprise: Telling the Dad-to-Be

couple with ultrasound

A baby was the furthest thing from our minds. We had just moved into a new apartment, and I was trying to get a promotion at work. We figured we’d have children one day, but not anytime soon.

We had a vacation planned shortly after the move. One day, when we were away,  I noticed my breasts were, well, huge! But I didn’t think much of it. That should have been my first clue.

A second clue came -- or didn’t come -- a few days later. I was supposed to get my period while we were away, but it never happened. “Don’t worry,” Ryan told me. “You’re just stressed out. It’ll come.”

I spent the next few weeks waiting for my period and searching online for explanations. I wasn’t even thinking about pregnancy. Unfortunately, the other possible causes made me more and more anxious and seemed much scarier than becoming a new mom. I finally scheduled an appointment with my doctor.

Ryan was sick the day of my appointment, so he couldn’t join me. I kept trying to reassure myself the whole time while traveling to the office, waiting in reception, and sitting in the doctor’s office after I peed in a cup. So, I was a little on edge when the nurse knocked on the door -- and even more on edge when dropped the supplies she was holding as she walked in.

As she picked up her instruments, she said, “Honey, you’re pregnant!”

“Excuse me?!”

“You’re very pregnant,” she repeated matter-of-factly.

I shouldn’t have been shocked, but I was. I spent the trip home panicking about how this would change our lives, what it would mean for my promotion -- and what in the world Ryan would say about becoming a new dad.

As soon as I walked in the door, I blurted it out: “Ryan, I’m pregnant.” Now, he was both sick and stunned. He looked at me, said, “OK,” and went right back to bed.

It took him about a week to process the news. I tried to let him adjust to this change on his own time, but of course, I couldn’t help but watch him a little more closely. He spent a lot of time online researching pregnancy and fatherhood. And I could swear he developed a slight sweating issue.

As we both got used to the idea, we became more and more excited. “I always knew we would have children,” Ryan told me. “It’s just a lot earlier than we expected.”

We’ve had to make a lot of changes since our daughter, Ava, was born, including moving from that one-bedroom apartment to a house and giving up the weekends we used to have to ourselves. But Ava is our angel and has brought new meaning to our lives. We wouldn’t have it any other way!

Photo by Meryl Spadaro on Unsplash